That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
