I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
