Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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