Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
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