you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
