he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
