If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
