I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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