turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
