Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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