woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
