Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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