Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
