nut hugger
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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