So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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