addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
