we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
