You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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