Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
So many bounce houses so little time
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
