and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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