I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
