i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
