I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
