We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
