If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
third nipple confirmed
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
