I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
