ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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