I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize
