Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Drake has all the answers
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Randomize
