i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
