I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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