we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize