Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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