I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
