Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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