Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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