if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
