i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize