Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
