I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Randomize
