Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
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