Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
either way he was missing a nipple.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
