she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
