I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
