I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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