Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
