return my video game
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize