Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
my vag is so smooth its legendary
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
