haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Randomize
