...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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