ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
